Good evening Gentlemen, Gentlewomen IT IS HAPPY HOUR over here in Oakland – drink ready?

Let’s do this…

Okay! ‘’Bah-humbug’’ to all the Valentines haters, come on, share a little love..

1)  New relationship? Heaving hot bodies stage? Making out wherever, whenever possible, anytime of the day, clothes on, clothes off, clothes around ankles, no clothes, back of the car etc…Well, if she says Valentines doesn’t mean anything to her –SHE IS LYING…buy her something

2) Be quiet. Well, I don’t mean the whole evening, but whether you are a Valentines hater or lover this is NOT the time to discuss the pros and cons. Zip it and let the love flow …

3)  Starry eyed? Getting all loved up? Okay, heed this advice.

You’re just horny.

Don’t do it.

This-is-not-the-time to ask for a lifetime commitment.

She has two options and you don’t want to hear one of the possible answers, promise.

Now, pull up your big boy pants, or not?! Take a quiet moment in the bathroom with yourself and address subject matter of the day   😉

4)       Gifts – Flowers, chocolates, lingerie…REALLY? Is this the best you can do? She should get that anyhow. Go to your nearest gifty/jewelry store & buy something. Trust me it will cost you the same as a bunch of over priced flowers, unless of course you pick them yourself then really I am ..speechless!

5)       Jewelry store no no’s – Don’t buy a ring. Why? Firstly, some of us have sausage fingers there is nothing more embarrassing than trying to squeeze into the gift and having it stuck on your finger, lack of blood supply to the heart and a visit to ER on Valentines is never romantic, ever. Secondly, it sends the wrong message; go back to #3 you were not listening!

Happy pre pre pre Valentines people, play safe and stay away from the rings.

Featured Image: Flickr user Geraint Rowland via Creative Commons