Did you know that the 90s are officially vintage now?

I first noticed this troubling fact a few years ago, while perusing thrift stores around Oakland. I would see a flowered kinderwhore grunge dress on a vintage rack right next to a golden disco goddess gown, and think: surely, this must be a mistake! But this was no anomaly, as my discovery of numerous Etsy pages for “90s vintage” proved. I even saw a D.A.R.E. sweatshirt proudly advertised as being in mint condition, and selling for 60 dollars. At that, and with a muffled sob of mourning for my rapidly retreating youth, I accepted that the 90s are now a time long gone.

Not that you’d know that, looking at my closet!

Throwback Thursday I shall delve deep into my reluctance to let go of my childhood with this little early 90s piece. Isn’t it something?vintage90sneckdetail

Let’s be clear here: this outfit is definitely intended for a child. And I am most certainly not a child, a fact made clearer to me every time I trammel, shove, and coax my frustratingly plentiful bosom into this outfit. It’s not the sort of thing I can wear to the office, and can only be trotted out for dive bars and other simliarly judgement-free zones. And yet, I can’t bear to get rid of this difficult dress!

 

vintage90sback

 

When accessorizing this silly little number, I don’t bother with nuance. I wear some gaudy pearl earrings that directly echo the pearl buttons, and sport a pert ponytail to emphasize the girlishness of the dress.

vintagepearlearrings

For now, the dress stays in my closet. As long as I can can bring myself to wear this in public, the 90s don’t seem so far away…

 

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