by Kobi Jae
In our current climate of self-representation and online existence, barely a week goes by where I don’t read some piece of internet wisdom proclaiming that selfies are an indicator of our descent into cultural desolation. According to some sources, anybody who engages with selfie-taking behavior is an arrogant narcissist.
Hi. *waves* Can I get a sticker that says that?
You see, I kind of disagree. I not only think taking selfies is heaps of fun, I also think they’re important — especially for people of size. Plus, it can be feminist AF.
But with perspectives like these, plus the complexities of being fat in a world that constantly reinforces the idea that we are unworthy of confidence (and love/great sex/fun clothes, etc.), of course the idea of turning that camera around on our own chub faces can be incredibly daunting.
(Note: I am aware that the world tells most people their bodies are not good enough, but there are levels of privilege, and I am here for the fatties).
So whether you’ve been wanting to get on that widely debated selfie trend but haven’t had the confidence to do so, or you already participate but feel kind of freaked that somebody may think you’re (heavens forbid) “vain,” here are 10 great reasons you should drop the doubt and get to clickin’.
1. It’s empowering to have control over how you present yourself.
Especially in a world that profits from stripping people of size of their body autonomy. Whether you choose to flaunt every single one of your chins, or to take carefully angled “myspace face” snaps, we are all entitled to present ourselves however we want. I award myself double points for anything that subverts size norms.
2. Selfies can be a radical act of self-love.
And, it feels rad to be able to say, “here’s me, and damn I look good today!”
3. They serve as a form of representation in a culture that so obviously lacks diversity.
We need more intersectionality in everything, and since the mainstream media are not going to be delivering on that anytime soon, we should take matters into our own hands (and cameras). A simple photo of yourself (with or without a caption) could be the very thing that somebody else needs to feel validated and less alone.
Church went great. The entire sermon was based around #inclusivity, #diversity and #acceptance. Diverse congregation, stunning building, beautiful music. I even ran into some @wrecklessfreeks fans!!! I definitely plan on going back. I felt very loved & welcome. (Also the sermon made me cry. A lot.) #christianfeminist #jesuswasabrownsocialistdissident
4. They can be art. Like, actually breathtakingly beautiful art.
Every body has bad days and good days. Today was a start to love myself again day. Its OK that my body has rolls and scars and bruises. My body is a fine body. All bodies are fine bodies. I like baths #effyourbeautystandards #bath #fatgirl #bubbles #mybodyisok #yourbodyisok #pizzasisters #honormycurves #bathbomb #lush #selflove #everythingisok
5. If you want them to, they can help you embrace your sexuality in a culture that desexualizes anybody who does not fit a certain ideal.
6. They can be a useful tool for documenting …
… our personal history, reminding ourselves of our own beauty, and appreciating how far we have come on our journey of self-love.
7. Sometimes that lighting is just so on point.
8. Sometimes, you’ve just gotta praise all of your chins.
(Confused about why anyone would want to show “all of their chins?” See points 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6.)
Oh you didn't request a fat goddess? Too bad. (This is totally from yesterday because #fatshionfebruary is so not happening today.) #fatbabe #fat #fatqueen #fatvanity #fatandhappy #riotsnotdiets #losehatenotweight #doublechin #2chins1babe #pizzasisters4lyfe #nofilter #goddess #forceofnature #bodypositive #bopo #radicalselflove #milestone
9. It’s refreshing and encouraging to know when other people are having a bad day.
Ditto point number 3. We spend so much time cultivating personas of happiness and achievement, it’s super comforting to be reminded that we all have days of wanting to lay in bed with Netflix and snacks.
Today I woke up feeling really shitty about myself and my body. Cause let's be real even confident powerful Fat women have their moments. Moments where every piece of clothing sucks. Moments when you let men dictate your self worth. Moments where you still feel like you don't know yourself when you look in the mirror. Usually I would embrace Satan's hate. But not today Satan! Sat in my studio that I am so grateful to have. Listened to music that I made. And just kept repeating gratitude because shit has been and could be a lot worse. Also thank the Universe for some mood stabling Strawberry Cough and Pearl Jam. 🙏🏽
Confidence is not: "They will like me", Confidence is: "I'll be fine if they don't" Goodnight… #MensFashion #BigAndTall #urbanstyle #urbanfashion #streetstyle #streetfashion #beard #beardgang #bear #beardporn #styleblog #malemodel #mensfashion #malefashion #bigmensfashion #bigandtallmodel #malestyle #mensfashionblog #fashion #plussizemalemodel #plussizemodel #effyourbeautystandards #bigandblunt #fatshion #brawn #plussizemenswear #plusmenrevolution
10. Snapchat filters are great.
Everyone loves seeing you as a cute AF alien/cat/flower crowned princess. Don’t keep that shit secret.
Kobi Jae is an unapologetically fat creative and bonafide cat lady from Melbourne, Australia. She can be found serving up fatshion-forward style and witty real talk at Horror Kitsch Bitch and on The ‘Gram.